Homeschooling an only child

We decided to pull the plug and homeschool our child when he was so unhappy and started talking about death, sometime into his 1st term in Year 1. I have to say then, tho I was very aware of my rights to educated him different, and that homeschooling is legal and permitted, i wasn't very sure where and how to start, other than to hand in that de-registration letter and to ask for formal acknowledgement from the headmistress.

I was also aware and prepared for the in-evitable enquiry from the LEA's. We were lucky in a sense that me and my kid is of foreign passport, hence we were able to justify that the LEA's involvement will not be able to support, but possibly obstruct his education. For we could not see how the LEA is able monitor suitability and efficiency of a foreign curriculum and syllabus that will be taught in duo language, English and Malay. It was our intention to part educate our son according to my homeland's syllabus and language, in preparation for our eventual return to my homeland.

So really, the fact that he'll be an only child didn't even register as a problem. I supposed me and hubby already resolved the "only child" question a long time ago when we have decided we will only have 1 kid. To us, the philosophy "less man, more share" applies. With only one kid, we can afford to provide the best of everything from attention and focus to financial matters. So really, "homeschooling only one" is not that different from our philosophy of having only one kid.

When we decided to homeschool DS, we were aware of the fact that we will be financially supporting his education on our own, which made us very glad that we only have 1 kid. From museums visits to homeschooling events and gatherings, movies to books to science kits, we're only paying for one, and not two or three. We are very electronic medium-based learning, so I am glad that I am only paying for 1 child's interest, from pc games to online community games to video games.

On our daily lives, I'm glad I am only homeschooling DS, for I only need to accomdate him, and no one else. We go wherever and whenever we want. I didn't have to play mediator between 2 or 3 children to find common grounds to make everyone happy. Every so often, I read of families with 2 or 3 kids, struggling to find common interest that will make everyone happy. In any homeschooling event, I can focus on helping my child with his chosen activity without having to be worry about the other child. We will stay for as long as we want and leave whenever we want.
Socialising? Well, if your child is the type that thrives on friends and social interaction, there is tons of homeschooling events, from drama to sports to science clubs to reading clubs to join in. And you don't even have to worry about which child does what, or pacifying the other child who hates drama classes but gets dragged along anyway because one of the child loves acting. When you have only one child, you can pick and choose to attend the one's that your child is interested in. My child don't like any structured or sit down events, so I was able to happily skipped alot of these without any guilt of the other child missing out.

My child started out being happy on his own. He had such a difficult time during his schooling years that he actually enjoyed the space and freedom of being left to his own devices. He opt to stay at home alot in the beginning, which was easily accomodated. We went to a few homeschooling gatherings but all he wanted to do was play on his own. He wasn't interested to join in playing with other children. After a few months, he just plainly told me he found the gatherings boring and would rather stay at home doing his own things. Because he was the only child, again it was easy to decide to do just that. During this time, we went out only when he felt like it. We went to places that he decided on, from swimming to movies to museums to bowling or which friend to call upon to visit.

One and a half years later, he's decided that he's had enough of being alone and now needed company, so he requested that we started attending regular homeschooling gatherings near us. Again, when and which gathering to attend is according to his preferance. Because he is the only child, I am aware that if he needs interaction with other kids, we'll have to go seeking it. Not all existing homeschooling groups appeals to my kid. So, if we want more our kind of social events than what's available, we created it, at the places he likes. Hence the occasional playdates in the park, at the local funhouse or even at our house. I'm not good at long term, regular events. I tend to organise "one off" events. We like outdoor, lots of space for high energy running and climbing, "doing what boys should be doing" sort of activities. There weren't many so we organised our own and listed our open-invitation on the local list. We always do end up having a lovely happy day full of fun and interactions with many other families. And because my child is the only child, he is very privilege to have loads of toys. Hence a playdate at our house is always convenient and exciting because he had so many toys to share with everyone. Homeschooling your only child allows you to accomodate your child's education according to his/ her interest, pace and development, and derive the best out of your current circumstances.

Lastly but not least, I have to say my child is diagnosed with Asperger. I strongly believed homeschooling DS alone has provided me the flexibility to accomodate him on all levels comfortably. It allows me plenty of time to focus on how best to facilitate his learning without having to split resources or worry about another child. And the luxury to drop it, chop it or change it, at the drop of a hat, if it doesn't work. Without having to consider the 2nd or 3rd child's needs. So to me, homeschooling an only child in the 21st century is no longer an issue. The invention of the internet has played a huge role in making homeschooling a viable and possible path, no matter where you are. It has provided huge support to many homeschooling families, and connected all of us homeschoolers to each other, at all times of the day. And this is no different to our children, especially our only child. With the invention of telephone and internet, our only child can now be as socially active as they want to be. My kid uses the telephone alot to speak to his friend. He also communicates alot with his online friends over the internet. With the common practise of possessing a family car, we're no longer alone and isolated, for social events can be easily accessible. Even without a car, the availability of public transport can help make it happen.

SharonBugs, happily and successfully unschooling 8 yrs old DS. http://mamagecko.blogspot.com/